Surprise!

I'm sure ((hope)) that lots of you have already heard..

But Blake and I are happy as can be over here to announce that after a year of trying and a few road bumps..

 In December if everything keeps going well we are expecting a new little baby!

Sooo since I have been sick and tired as can be.. do I get a pass for not blogging for the past like 3 months?

[Holy smokes 3 months, eugh that sounds horrible even for me..]

I will say that the hard thing is that even though I feel a lot of joy and hope right now, 

I think through everything Blake and I have been both a little hesitant to let ourselves be completely relaxed and excited..

At every doctors appointment we are both nervous and holding our breath that everything is still healthy. 

But the first time we saw the little heart beating we both were choking back tears.

[I think if we wouldn't have had a pep talk before the doctor came in about how no matter what happened we were going to be tough and not cry and it was going to be okay, we would have both been balling.]

 

Pregnancy has definitely been harder than I thought it would be..

Don't get me wrong I am SO grateful that it means we can have a baby.. and I told myself that if we got pregnant I would never complain about anything.. but it has been HARD the last few months.

A month ago I had told Blake we were going to have to adopt our last children because I didn't think I could keep going through all the sickness again and again.

I have been absolutely EXHAUSTED.. and with a full time job and over an hour commute every day,

 naps have just been kind of out of the question.

So there have been tears.. and early bed times.. more cleaning and dinner by my poor Blake.. and as you can see no blogging. 

But worse than the tiredness has been this terrible cycle of my body making it impossible to eat anything & not eating anything making me very sick... My throat would tense up and not swallow and food and smells all made me very very nauseous.. oh and brushing my teeth.. like clock work = throwing up.

 I have lost quite a bit of weight for me & with moving and packing

 (my in laws have been SO sweet & let us move in with them for this last little bit so that we could work things out with our Rexburg apartment and be here for my brother and sister in laws weddings before we move to Texas.. oh my they are a blessing in my life.)

and both of our jobs and my process of trying to get into graduate school and figuring out everything in Texas.. 

 I have to admit that there have definitely been easier times in my life.

BUT in the last week or so all of the sudden I can eat most things again..

& I haven't thrown up.. and I am LESS exhausted than I was.. [still tired.. but it's manageable] but I almost feel like myself again and I am on cloud 9 about it!

So things are looking up and I'm really enjoying the fact that I am pregnant.

Also.. can we talk about how our due date is December 22nd!

Life is quite ironic.. & Heavenly Father has a funny way of making you realize that you are never in charge. 

[which is probably good because He has always shown me that his plan is better than mine anyway..]

But I have always told Blake that I don't care when we have a baby {I just wanted one} as long as it was any month but December because I wanted it's birthday not to be right around Christmas..

& lo and behold.. our poor baby might very well have a Christmas birthday. 

The Doctor told us we couldn't be induced until the day after my due date [so the 23rd..] we will be cutting it very close.. pray for an early delivery!

In more pregnancy news we actually find out the gender on FRIDAY [the 11th]!

So stay tuned.. I am committing to be much better at documenting our life.. there are lots of things going on right now that I definitely want to remember and be able to share with my kids.. and with any of our loved ones that are interested!
:)

& As a side note... I am quitting my job in less than three weeks.. yay yay yay..  it feels like things are starting to come together and so I am hoping that I will have more time for the things/people that I love.

 [So just bear with me over the next few days as I catch up the blog a little bit from the last couple of months..]